I was having another one of my typical protracted arguments on Twitter (OK fine, X) the other day and in the course of that rather heated discussion, I was told that my thoughts didn’t matter, since I was nothing but a Laurentian Elite. I suppose that was intended as an insult, but now I’m not entirely sure. It’s not every day that you can be called elite at anything.
And the Laurentiens, or as we Quebec born snobs like to call them – Les Laurentides – is actually a pretty spectacular part of cottage country north and west of Montreal, replete with lakes cottages, ski hills, lakes and black flies. I mean, it’s no Eastern Townships (IYKYK) but it’ll do in a pinch.
And I suppose it’s better than being called a “seppie” which is a not very nice pejorative term for, I guess, someone who cleans septic tanks?
Look, I know what it means, but indulge me a bit.
I guess the main thing is that it has only been two weeks and the battle lines on this whole referendum on whether to have a referendum are beginning to be firmly demarcated. All the dogs are lined up marking their territory.
People are organizing themselves into influencers, advocates, third party advertisers, grifters, opportunists and parasites. On both sides.
A new language is starting to emerge as well as people find themselves bucketed and bracketed and the whole neverendum referendum conversation takes centre stage.
At the same time, a veritable bevy of Canadian intellectuals, Laurentiens, Fire-wallers, has-beens, would be’s, wannabes’, never wills, politicians, business trade groups, pundits, opinion makers, entertainers and stakeholders have been spending their time penning emotional missives to one side of the cause or the other. Staking out their moral high ground so to speak in eager anticipation of being able to cash in on some lucrative speaking fees or social media clicks and hype in order to build their brand and maybe, just maybe, get invited onto Power & Politics with Vassy Kapelos and having their ass removed and handed back to them in less than 20 minutes.
I call it the “Where I’m At” attention-seeking statement phase.
It’s all so confusing and predictable.
But in the interests of moving things along (and TBH filling the time between my kid’s high school graduation and the banquet with a short blog), I thought I would share some random thoughts on Should I Stay or Should I Go (Alberta Edition).
Where I’m at – my “brave” statement… 😊
Well there is no secret to this. I grew up in Quebec (Montreal to be precise). I lived through Rene Levesque, Bill 101, the Parti Quebecois and the sovereignty movement there during a pretty economically sensitive time. I also left Quebec. For work. For opportunity. To get away from the noise. I’ve lived in Saskatchewan for 6 years and Calgary since 1998. I’ve been around. And I’ve had the opportunity to travel fairly extensively across Canada and like to think I know a bit about the country, its economy and its various regions.
It’s fair to say I’m a federalist. And I think separation is a fantasy that is completely unworkable whether it is Alberta or Quebec. In my view, it’s stupid. So, I guess on that point I agree with Mark Carney, although when I say it, people mostly shrug and move on, but when he says it we have to spend a whole week rehashing it while Pierre Poilievre tries to find something that rhymes with it (hint – insipid, vapid, cupid).
And before everyone goes all kooky on me and starts a petition to remove me from the province – yes, I get it. There is a litany of grievances and legitimate complaints that Albertans can levy against the federal government.
Electoral representation, carbon taxes, transfer payments, perceived and actual indifference to resource projects, a paternalistic and condescending attitude, disproportionate attention paid to industries in vote-rich areas, immigration, 10 years of a party in charge that was at times overtly hostile to an industry that pays A LOT of bills, condescension, mocking of Stampede and our red necks, not liking country music enough, TSN (Toronto Sports Network), the CBC, Stephen Guilbeault. All these things matter. I just don’t agree that we need to blow up the entire building in order to renovate the parkade.
But that’s just me.
A few things I’ve noticed over the past few weeks that I think are worthy of mention.
First, the separatists seem to be positioning themselves in a less hard-core fashion than they did during their petition gathering phase. Now it’s all soft “we’re just looking to have a conversation” instead of “get the commie jackboot off my throat, don’t tread on me” stuff from just a few weeks ago.
We’ve had a couple of inconclusive debates featuring Jason Kenney and some lawyer named Keith Wilson who seems to have emerged as the defacto “smarter” voice of the separatist cause, mainly because he isn’t a lunatic. I was going to say because he’s a lawyer, but the cowboy hat dude is a lawyer as well and he is a bit unhinged.
At the same time, a number of groups are coalescing in support of either side. Some are grassroots and some are astro turf – so watch your Achilles and ACL’s.
Most of these have participants whose names you will no doubt recognize from their participation or pontification in the great political debates of the past 5, 10 and 50 years. One of the more remarkable things I have personally noticed about them is that invariably, I will have been blocked by one or two members of each group on social media – regardless of what they support. I don’t know whether that says more about them or me, but it is noteworthy! Apparently I am an equal opportunity snark.
The politicians as well are coming out of the woodwork. Danielle Smith, after lighting the wildfire, has availed herself of a fire truck. She doesn’t know how to drive it yet, but it has got lots of hoses, a ladder and fire-retardant chemicals.
The Federal Conservatives, under Pierre Poilievre, have come out and said they will campaign in support of a united Canada. I don’t know why this is noteworthy, they are a federal party. That said, the most rabidly separatist area in Alberta is PP’s riding. So maybe it’s good that he can’t force an election on a confidence vote just yet. No word whether his constituency office has been vandalized yet.
The federal NDP (remember them?), led by the regrettable Avi Lewis seems to know not what to do. The only development worthy of note was Mr. Lewis’s comment that basically said only Quebec separatism is legitimate because culture, language blah blah blah. Super helpful. Thanks Avi. Maybe read up on “do no harm”.
The provincial NDP is flailing. Naheed Nenshi, the supposed leader and saviour of the party, should be making it rain on this type of stuff, but he has been lapped by other members of his caucus and put in a form of penalty box by the aforementioned Lewis and the relationship between the Federal and Provincial parties.
Stephen Harper emerged from his hyperbaric chamber long enough to say that he would campaign for a united Canada, an announcement that was celebrated given he was an author of the famed “Firewall” memo that is a contributor to separatist fervour. Of course he is also a former prime minister of Canada, so not sure where people thought he would actually go.
Speaking of former prime ministers, Justin Trudeau has been holed up in some Bahamian love nest with his new girlfriend Katy Perry. Let’s hope that continues.
Mark Carney, as noted elsewhere, says that separatism is stupid.
The leaders of the separatist movement are all over the map and are bigly mad about the referendum. Will they coalesce around one individual at some point? There are many – the aforementioned Keith Wilson and then the cowboy guy. Some guy named Mitch that the king is attempting to kill. Lots of social media super-stars with catchy names like Albertaaardvark, Marty Up North, Canada is Cooked, Bertaprouddad and Freedom Honey. And now “The Rebel” has announced they will flex their considerable media muscle in support of separatism… Oh Ezra.
It’s a rogues gallery and they are prolific in their spin, but I feel that they colossus of government may ultimately roll over them.
Danielle Smith popped their magic beans and free-ride balloon by suggesting that separation could end up costing $400 billion or more. The separatists weren’t happy about that. The economic analysis will come later from me, once I have some better data.
Finally let’s not forget the assorted punditocracy, social media warriors, opinionators and, yes, attention seekers, whose sole purpose in life seems to be to malign, mock and marginalize the separatists, call Danielle Smith a traitor, dump on fossil fuels and pipelines, rage against the US administration and tell us all what to do. I call them the “please sit this one out” crew. Even Avi Lewis is a better advocate for “Alberta remain” than these dudes.
I think we are all caught up.
Before I leave this disconnected and short two-week mark referendum check in, a couple of terms to note.
Seppie – I don’t know who coined this term first, but it means separatist. I hate it. It’s smug, demeaning and is used in such a snide way that it can’t but be offensive and thus serve as a rallying point for the seppie, oops separatist, cause. It needs to go away. If the goal is to win over the soft middle, giving the other “side” the pseudo-oppressive ammunition they need by inventing for them a form of “N” word is just dumb. Stop it.
Laurentien Elite and/or Oppressors – these are the boffins, bureaucrats and intellectuals who pontificate from the safety and relative isolation of their ivory castles in, primarily, Ottawa. You know who they are. They are the personification of the “war against Alberta” by eastern bums and creeps and are active members of any of a number of anti-Alberta conspiracy theories. To people who come from Central and Eastern Canada, this is kind of an eye-roll term. I mean if you want to say “Ottawa” or the “The Feds” just say it. Regular Joe living east of Manitoba actually knows very little about Alberta and probably cares less. This is both a blessing and a curse. But these aren’t the elites. Also, for the umpteenth time – OTTAWA IS NOT ACTUALLY IN THE LAURENTIANS!!!
Laurentien Consensus – this of course is the modus operandi of the aforementioned elite. A meeting of the minds that provides for the subjugation of the oppressed Alberta nation, the holding back of its energy industry at all costs to placate the puppet masters of the Davos.
Magic Beans – this is an economic tool used by the separatist movement to make predictions about all the unicorn farts and pixie fairy dust we will be showered with if only we ditch the socialist parasite called Canada. It’s like Keynesian Economics on steroids but without all the printing of money.
Sovereign Alberta within a United Canada – this is exactly what it looks like and is from the UCP charter. It’s soft-core pandering to waffling separatists: “You can have all you want if we just keep punching the Liberals in the nose and wait until a Conservative government gets elected.
Duty to Consult – I mean we all know what this means. It’s constitutional and unavoidable. First Nations must be meaningfully consulted on any matter that affects their constitutional rights. Not after the fact window dressing. In advance. Some people learn this the hard way, including pipeline people and, as it turns out, petition solicitors.
Natural Born Albertan – according to some of the leadership of the separatist movement, once Alberta becomes its own country only people born here will be granted citizenship of the branch plant. So that means that someone like me – a Laurentien Elite who moved here in 1998 will not be deemed worthy of Alberta citizenry and will thus be… I don’t know, deported? Put in a refugee camp? Not exactly the best way to grow your support and have a thriving post breakup economy when you tell the estimated 40% to 45% of the population that was born outside of the province that they aren’t welcome – unless of course they are fertile women willing to have babies, then they can stay – I kid you not.
As I said, the separatist side is a bit all over the place.
Voices – we all have them. And opinions too. Sometimes we share them. Sometimes it doesn’t go so well. In these politically fraught and tense moments, let’s all agree to avoid hyper-partisan extremism, spurious insults, condescending elitism (Laurentian or otherwise) and otherwise unhelpful dialogue. We have a lot of opinions in Canada and a lot of opinion sharers. The loudest and most strident or the most prosaically written isn’t necessarily the best. Let’s keep that in mind. Debate. Don’t debase.
